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Jemima Kirke Talks Daytime Sex, Polyamory, and Putting Out on the First Date



What is a dating “rule” that you think is B.S.?

The idea that you can “put out” or sleep with someone too soon is a myth. I think that can happen whenever. I don’t think that’s ever going to make or break the relationship, if you put out on the first date. I’ve always put out on the first date! I mean, if you’re gonna get nothing out of it, you might as well get something out of it.

I definitely don’t think you need to go everywhere together. One of my pet peeves is when people suddenly become a unit—you invite one person and they assume that you invited both because they’re married or they’re together. I’ve had that experience of people just showing up with the spouse that I didn’t invite. That annoys me. I also think that taking space, even weeks, months can be great. In my experience of dating a musician, having that space really kept the romance alive.

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What’s the weirdest thing you do when you’re by yourself?

I have a lot of little tchotchkes and I organize them into arrangements that are appealing to me, like a little still-life. Another thing I’m a fan of lately is just sitting there. Like, just sitting. Not moving. Just giving my whole being a rest. Some people would call that meditation. I’m not doing anything that deliberate. I’m just sitting there. If someone walked in, they would think I was catatonic.

What’s your go-to hangover cure?

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Lots of carbohydrates, sugar—things that will make you feel worse, but they feel good in the moment. And no appointments that day would be ideal.

What’s your favorite onscreen sex scene?

There are a few. God, let me think. I would usually have such a fucking great answer for that. There’s one in Panic in Needle Park with Kitty Winn and Al Pacino and the whole thing takes place under the blankets and we see it from outside. It’s very playful. Another one is in a movie called Boxcar Bertha with Barbara Hershey and David Carradine. They have sex in a boxcar, in, you know, a freight train.

What is the most surprising place you have ever hooked up with someone?

I’m not very adventurous with locations. I just find a bed to be the best place to do anything. It’s comfortable, you have lots of space. When I say a bed, I mean a king-size strictly, or a California king. A locked door. Good daylight. I love the daylight for that kind of thing, for sex. If the connection is there, I don’t really need any bells and whistles.

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Are you an astrology person?

When it’s convenient.


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